I am an outgoing introvert. It sounds like an oxymoron.
When the social settings are just right, I bloom. I create a space for myself in the conversation and feed off of the energy from the people around me. In other strikingly similar situations, I instinctually retreat and wonder why I signed up to go to a networking event in the first place.
Over the course of my life, I’ve found my internal balance between both sides are so close that it becomes tricky when my friends try to understand me or when meeting new friends. Thankfully, I’m not the only one. I’ve met a good number of friends who think similarly. And in an effort to explain the complexities of us outgoing introverts, here are a few things you need to know about your extroverted introvert friends:
- Sometimes we get lost in our thoughts. We basically live in our minds. This makes it really easy to misread and misunderstand us.
- We’re terrible at texting but excellent at listening in person. And we don’t really care to improve our texting skills.
- Small talk makes us uncomfortable. We want to know the most inward thoughts os a person and think of small talk as a barrier to that goal. Over time, we learnt to stop being so intense and find a happy medium. Be patient with us.
- We are adventurous but value our peace and quiet.
- We tend to close off the more intimate parts of ourselves if we don’t feel that it is valued. And because we can sometimes be mistaken for extroverts, you may not even notice when we do.
- We love you…like a lot. We love people the people around us and are genuinely interested in them.
- We need time alone. Only we know how to dictate the balance between our love for people and our love to be alone. When we withdraw, don’t take it personally. We just need some time to recharge.
- We are good at figuring people out and trust our intuition.
- We need to be poured into. We spend a lot of time giving of ourselves. When our friends intentionally pour into us, we flourish.
- You’ll never get bored with us. Just ask us what we’re thinking and you’ll get a different answer every single time.