Its been a long time. But this week I’m probably going to catch you all up on thins occurring in my life. This weekend I went on a Chapter retreat for my sorority and it was pretty amazing. I always go into retreats expecting something but every time God tops my expectations. The first retreat I remember feeling welcomed, the second broken at God’s feet, the third I was affirmed of his plans for me and now for what seems to be my last retreat I received closure. Weird huh? I had been in constant turmoil about things that frustrated me in phi lamb and situations that broke my heart for Jesus. Coming into retreat, i must admit, i felt distant. I didn’t have “my people” with me, I don’t have a little, and the dynamic was so different. I felt detached and like I was watching from the outside and I had been feeling this for a while. Needless to say, I was excited for what God was going to do but not so much for the fun parts in between.
So against my anxiousness I went expecting a whole bunch of awkwardness and God showed me something completely different. I definitely think I came back with stronger bonds than before but I don’t think that was the point. I felt like I was observing a goodbye. I feel like that’s weird to say but I cant think of a better way to describe it. through this weekend god showed me why I joined. He showed me what Phi Lamb brought me through the lives of some of my younger sisters. He reminded me of my passion and naivety. He brought old friends back and reminded me of strong girls who have changed my life even though they weren’t a direct part in it. I had fun with my sisters and in a way came full circle from when i first went to chapter retreat. I had been stressing myself over solving problems saw or addressing issues and God just raised me up a little so I could see part of the bigger picture. “They’re going to be ok.” he said. and I have found such peace in that. God showed me so much of the beauty in Phi Lamb and reminded me that there will always be girls there serving Him and serving His daughters. By the end of retreat I still felt separated but not because of the weight of our issues but because it’s my time to say goodbye. Its not a sad goodbye but full of peace and love. This is my last semester in Sigma Phi Lambda. I couldn’t be more thankful for my time there or the girls who have influenced and rocked my life. I know that the support and love from this sorority continues outside of chapter meetings and socials and I have so many life friends that will be just as secure in a life outside of Phi Lamb. So thanks girls! I love you all more than you know!
This just a song that has brought me so much peace this weekend. Its called Hide Away by Sovereign Grace Music. And this video has a little hint of what my next blog post will be about!